Author: lleffler

Categories
Beauty in Brokenness

Moving Waters

As I watch the water gently flowing by it looks so calm and peaceful – moving so slowly it is almost still.

I am drawn to that stillness. I envy that stillness. To be moving forward at a gentle pace is a state that I work so hard to achieve and I so often miss the mark.

I think I miss out on that peace because I idealize it as a constant state that one can live in but even the river doesn’t enjoy that peace for long. Not far down stream there is a little waterfall where the water changes abruptly from quiet and still to noisy turmoil.

I often forget that the turmoil in life is also a natural state. There are times in life that seem chaotic and overwhelming but underneath that chaos is an opportunity for learning and growth.

A waterfall will not always stay the same. Over time the force of the water will wear away the stone – in some places gentling the drop and at others making it more pronounced. It is influenced by the world around and it leaves a mark on the world as it moves forward.

When you find yourself in times of rushing waterfalls look for places where you can make positive changes in yourself and the world around you.

When your life is in a time of calm and gentle progress forward give thanks for the peace and tranquility in life. And when you find yourself in a time of turmoil know that although times of rapid growth and change can be tiring and overwhelming it won’t last forever.  There will be still waters ahead once again

Categories
Scripture Reflections

Cast the First Stone

This is a reflection I wrote after praying the scripture John 8:1-11. If you are not familiar with the story about the woman saved from stoning, I would suggest reading first. You can find here: https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=John+8%3A1-11&version=NRSV. You will notice some differences between the scripture and the reflection. Praying scripture is an invitation to be inspired by the scripture and see where it takes you. If you would like to know more about praying scripture you can email me at lleffler@live.ca .

I look through the crowd at each face searching for someone to save me – to help me.
I cannot escape this mob on my own. 
Some of the faces are angry.
What fills them with so much rage?
Others look like they just got swept up in the crowd.
I face each one of them in turn, silently pleading for help,
but each of them turn away.
Some of them at least have the decency to look ashamed of their inaction.

This is it.
No one is coming…

And then suddenly there is movement at the back of the crowd.
They are parting to let someone through.
Is it my lover coming to speak in my defense?
No, he will not come for me now…
…what good would it do?

The man reaches the front of the crowd.
I don’t recognize him but somehow, I feel like I know him.
He has a divine aura surrounding him.
This must be the Messiah everyone is talking about.
This must be Jesus.

Surely, he will save me from this mob.
Surely, he will speak out on behalf of love.

But he just stands there
and slowly bends to pick up a long stick at our feet.
He moves, slowly, deliberately,
drawing something on the ground.

I don’t see, how this will save me.
I don’t understand why he is not saying anything to the crowd.

He just keeps drawing.

But then I look up at the crowd once more
and I notice a change settling over them.
Before they were loud, angry, irrational,
but now they are stilling,
and a quiet curiosity settles over the crowd.
Whatever this man says now they will be able to listen.

Surely, he will speak out in my defense.
Surely, he will explain it is not a crime to love someone
when there is consent from everyone directly impacted.

He draws one last line,
I feel a circle of protection around me.
I know the crowd will not be able to harm me today.

And then finally he speaks,
“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.”

The crowd is silent.
Nobody moves
and then slowly one by one they walk away.

I am relieved but also a little disappointed…

This man could have spoke out in my defense.
He could have shown them their judgement was unfounded.
He could have spoken on behalf of women,
and made a significant change.
Why didn’t he say more?

Perhaps, the time wasn’t right?
Perhaps, they weren’t ready to listen?

But as I sit here,
still bound in place by the relief of my salvation,
I can’t help but wonder…
…will they ever be ready?

All I know is I am ready…
As I take my first shaky step out of my circle of protection,
I know one thing with absolute certainty…
I WILL NO LONGER KEEP SILENT!

Categories
Scripture Reflections

On the Cross

This is a reflection I wrote after praying the scripture Matthew 27:45-51 (https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+27%3A45-51&version=NRSV). It is a conversation between Jesus and God while he is on the cross.

The pain is lessening…I am starting to go numb.
The end is coming…
              …soon.

“My God, my God why have you forsaken me?”

I did everything you asked.
I travelled and taught.
I worked so hard to open their hearts to you.

Why was this necessary?
Why couldn’t we make them listen?

You can’t do it for them.
They have to open their own hearts.

Then what was the point?
Was it all for nothing?

What was the point?
You touched so many lives!
Opened so many hearts and minds to my spirit!

Yeah, and a fat lot of good that did!
I am still here on the cross.

Of course, it did good!
More good than you will ever know.
Just because you can’t see it now, doesn’t mean you didn’t make a difference!

But why does it have to end in hurt?

This isn’t the end…
…it is only the beginning…

Categories
Beauty in Brokenness

Looking at the Moon

I know there is a full moon tonight…but I can’t find.  I search the skies looking for the faintest hint of its ethereal light.  All I can see are tones of grey and black with tiny snowflakes glittering in the sky.  The moon is full tonight, but I cannot see it.

Even when we cannot see it the moon is ever-present – orbiting the earth, pushing and pulling the tides.  Its movement is essential to life as we know it on earth.  Its cycles mark the passage of time and teach us about the rhythms of life.  At each stage of the lunar cycle our perception of the light it is reflecting changes.  At some points in the cycle it is full and bright, at other points it is barely a sliver of light.

Like the moon our life too goes through phases.  Times when everything seems full and bright and times when it seems like darkness is surrounding you.  Sometimes those cycles are the predictable rhythms of life. At other times it seems like life should be full of light but clouds of darkness obscure your vision. If you are experiencing an unexpected time of darkness – a loss of loved one, financial hardship, feeling lost and need of direction – it is so important to remember that it is part of life’s rhythm.  It is hard.  It is painful.  It is overwhelming but somewhere deep inside you can find the strength to continue on.  The moon is full tonight…you may not be able to see it right now…but it is there!

Where do you find yourself in the rhythm of life today? What do you need to prepare yourself for tomorrow?

Categories
Rewritten Psalms

Psalm 84

How wondrous is this world that you made, O God!
I am in awe that you made a home for us in your creation.
My spirit soars as I am warmed by the sun
and caressed by the gentle breath of the wind.
Your breath stirring me back to life,
Opening my eyes and my heart to all the life around me.
The children playing and laughing as they enjoy the warmth of the sun after a long winter.
The ducks on the edge of the pond building a home for the little ones soon to come.
The birds soaring on the wind calling out to one another.
The bees flitting from blossom to blossom carrying new life for the trees and flowers.

I pray that I will be worthy of your wondrous gift of creation.
Teach me to live a life that honours you;
Never taking more than I need,
And giving generously where I can.

I could live a thousand lifetimes and never be worthy of all you have given me!
But the greatest gift of all is that you don’t ask me to be worthy;
You don’t ask me to be perfect.
You inspire me to do my best and pick me up when I stumble.
I am and will be eternally grateful to be a part of your awesome creation!

For the original Psalm visit https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+84&version=NRSV

Categories
Rewritten Psalms

Psalm 83

God, let your voice be heard!
Let your cry for justice ring out,
reverberating through every living thing.
A sweet melody to the oppressed,
And a call to reconciliation to the oppressors.

Tear out the injustice in the world,
Burn away all the impurities in our souls,
Until everyone is left only with their best selves,
(however much or little that may be).

Put an end to hate and division,
call out racism,
call out homophobia and transphobia,
call out gender discrimination sexual violence,
call out ageism,
call out ableism,
call out all the things that separate us from your love,
shatter them with you cry,
until all violence and discrimination is burned away,
by your love.

For the original Psalm visit https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+83&version=NRSV

Categories
Rewritten Psalms

Psalm 82

God you are the only one who can judge us truly but…
When will you start holding the greedy accountable for taking too much?
When will you put a stop to wicked, hurtful behavior?
When will you call our societies to account for how they treat your people?

How long can you sit and watch people starving,
exploited,
harassed,
injured,
killed,
and not pass judgement?
Not demand change?

Without you who will show these lost souls the way of love,
and finally put an end to their despicable, inhumane actions?

Claim your place at the head of all nations
and pass your judgement to bring equity for all your people!

For the original Psalm visit https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+82&version=NRSV

Categories
Rewritten Psalms

Psalm 81

Raise your voice in song!
Sing praises God who offers strength and comfort.
Listen to the rhythm of God in the beat of the drums,
Feel God’s presence in the strum of a guitar,
Sing God’s praises with all the strength your voice can muster.

Sing praise for the changing seasons,
Greet each morning with song,
Let your songs of praise ring out throughout the day,
Acknowledge the stages of the moon
and the stages of life
with the music of your soul.

As you sing listen for the voice calling out to you,
Adding depth and harmony to your song.
Listen for God in your music, singing:

“I call out to you in love,
do you hear me?
I am here with you in times of trouble,
enfolding you in my love.

I call out to you to love,
Do you hear me?
Care for your friends and neighbours,
care for all my creation.

Listen for my voice,
pulsing through your life.
I am here to offer you guidance and strength.
I am here to show you the way.

When you are lost
listen for my voice.
I am here with you.
I am here for you.”

For the original Psalm visit https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+81&version=NRSV

Categories
Rewritten Psalms

Psalm 80

Hear us, O God, source of being,
whose life energy has flowed through the world
since the dawn of time.
Let your energy be felt
pulsing through all of life
and set us on the right course once again!

Restore us to a path of life,
save us from this path of destruction.

O God, please do not let your justified anger
with what we have done separate us from your love.
Let us feel your judgement not as an overwhelming criticism
but as a call to better behavior.

Restore us to a path of life,
save us from this path of destruction.

You have planted a seed within us,
a pulse, a lifeforce,
but we have choked out your light with weeds.
Cut away those things that separate us from you,
our greed,
our selfishness,
our abuse of the environment,
our isolation,
our broken community,
burn away all that separates us from you
so that we may flourish once again.

Nurture in us the love that you have planted within us,
let your light shine upon us,
and through us.
Heal the hurts within us and around us,
Renew our Spirits,
Renew the earth.
Let us sing your praises once again
for the good you do in us
and the good of your creation.

Restore us, O God!

For the original Psalm visit https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+80&version=NRSV

Categories
Rewritten Psalms

Psalm 79

God you have gifted us with so much
but we did not respond in gratitude.
We took that gift and tore it apart.
We gutted the earth pulling out more resources than we needed,
We tore down forest to build concrete jungles.
We filled the oceans with garbage – destroying habitats –
and even defiled the rivers and streams that feed our water supplies.
We take so much more than we need
and fight over each tiny scrap with our neighbour;
Even though if we worked together
your bounty would be enough for all!

God, you must be furious with us.
How can you look at the destruction we wrought
and not respond in anger?
Are you punishing us for the damage we have done?
Or are we creating our own punishment?

God, help us to learn from our mistakes.
Teach us to work together for healing of your earth.
Guide our hands so we may be the good stewards
you intended us to be.
Teach us to love each other and earth,
as you love us,
and we will be eternally grateful!

For the original Psalm visit https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=psalm+79&version=NRSV